One, two....

...crap on my shoe. Oh what I'd do for a downstairs loo.

M is a bit constipated, he's been doing teeny weeny poos every time he's been on "the bucket". Most frustrating for him, I feel. It was my own lazy fault it got on my boots. I couldn't be bothered taking the bucket upstairs today and I left it on the stairs to take up later. It got knocked, by E I think. I noticed but thought everything was contained and rinsed it out. Later this evening I noticed a wee pebble of poo sitting at the bottom of the stairs. I laughed, no big deal. Then I moved my boots and got a finger full of turd ;( That'll teach me.

Apparently 30 minutes of stair climbing burns 150 calories. I was hoping I could justify scoffing some chocolate, but maybe not.

Closeness

It usually happens that when I acknowledge something, or talk about it (NOT bragging!...) it cocks up what we've had going on, so I feel slightly reluctant to comment too much on our EC journey at the moment! Suffice to say, all is well ;)

I managed to pee M in the middle of IKEA today. It was less attention grabbing than breastfeeding him! He has a bit of a toilet aversion and prefers to go outside or on his little bowl. I had tried to get him to go on the loo but he wouldn't. I knew he needed a wee in the pot plant bit so I sat on the little kids stool by the play bit and he had a BIG wee. We seem quite attuned at the moment, it's lovely.

I really miss having this sense of closeness with my big-little girl, and wonder if and when I'll ever rediscover this with her. It's there in fleeting moments: when we cook and bake, snuggling, reading, painting, talking and holding hands when we walk, but far less predictable or constant than with M. I suppose that's what letting kids grow up is about to a certain extent, growing apart. Since M's been here it's been much harder to connect with her, and I sense I need to give more to her, make more effort to stay in tune. As M's first birthday approaches I feel more than a twinge of sadness when I think of it being whole year since I was totally hers. My sweet and lovely baby girl. 

At last!...

....I update the blog! I have been distracted and engrossed in life the last few weeks but feel slightly disappointed in myself each time I steal a look at Sue Ann's page and the bit under my heading that says " 3 weeks ago..."

Not much to tell on the EC front. I have abandoned the little knickers for now as I was getting through too many pairs of trousers! Missing wees combined with a growth spurt on M's part meant I was running out of clothes for him. I've discovered that I can get away with not using a wrap on the cloth nappy which is a sort of cheat's way to do training pants I suppose. If I miss a big wee his pants do get wet so the incentive to get him pottied is definitely there, almost as powerful as with the knickers. But at the same time a little wee is not going to soak him, or me so I have a little more leeway. And it's nice to be able to check the state of the nappy without it being all sweaty and hard to get at.

Strike wise we seem to be over the poo thing, thank goodness. Still the occasional moment where I've been a little slow (read lazy and/or determined to read the paper without distraction on a Saturday morning...where's your Dad?) but more or less 100% clean. Phew. He is still resistant to actually sitting on the potty so I am still holding him on his bucket or over a potty. Actually, he is pretty resistant to that unless he has some fascinating and novel distraction, hence our phone stopped working due to dribble this week! ;) Not sure when or how I am going to get him on a "proper" receptacle but we'll figure that out later. A wee (and sometimes a poo) in the great outdoors is always a dead cert, no distraction required!

M is a most communicative little boy, bless him. He's been chatting away for a few months now..banana, Dada, Nana (for Mama) Eddy (for Esme), caaaat but he actually said "weeeeeeeeee" the other day which was brilliant. At 11 months he finally cut his first tooth, the upper left front one, on Monday. And he says, "eeeeeeeeeth. owwwwwwwww." points into my mouth and signs pain!

So what's been distracting me? Reading novels, making onion marmalade, baking muffins for J to take to work and share, and I admit it, watching the BBC iPlayer! Hey, it's winter and I've watched no telly for 4 years so a little light entertainment won't do me too much harm. I've been reflecting on what I've been watching with friends online and at LLL today so perhaps I will share some thoughts on what I've seen here soon. But not now or I won't have anything to say for another 3 weeks ;)

peace and love to everyone XXX